Jackrabbits of the Apocalypse, I Did It Again... Sorry!

I have to apologize for yesterday's post (since I don't believe in removing old posts unless they offend TOO many people). Enough whining for now.

I have focus today: shopping trip, preschool for the boy, and registration for the preschool that I really want him to get into next year. Lots to do! Okay, not so much. But I'm excited to have something other than just facebooking on the agenda. Not that I ever do that....

So I want to just leave you with this, our friendly little neighbours:

Jackrabbits of the apocalypse! They're ba-ack!

I Blame Pigs In Space

I wish to clear up a little misunderstanding. We only had the sniffles. We didn't have the flu. Sorry to concern anyone. (By the way, I really appreciate the sympathy shown. It means a lot.) Our sniffles didn't even amount to a real cold. Just some slimy mucus that had been smeared across an improperly-blown nose.

Evan's was worse.

But I want to clear up other misconceptions and miscommunications that have been happening more broadly. It seems talk about H1N1 has been going around to the nth degree lately. It's hard to know what to think or believe, from one news show to another, from the latest web report to the latest gossip on the street. I've done a lot of reading and thinking and even some cogitating. As of this moment, the facts are as follows:

1) H1N1 is a mutated form of the Spanish Pandemic Flu of 1918 that killed millions worldwide, and which was discovered in the Arctic by scientists, who thawed those little flu germs out and played with them, looking for either a) a vaccine "just in case" another pandemic were to happen, or b) a biological weapon to create a worldwide crisis and pandemic to control the media and/or world resources.

2) The swine flu went around about 40 years ago, at which time many people suffered through it and acquired an immunity. Those born after 1970 do not have an immunity and will suffer and most likely fall dead from it.

3) The swine flu kills mostly young, healthy people, not like the "regular flu" which usually claims for it's own the very young, very old, or sick/weak people. Which leads to the assumption that H1N1 is, in fact, a biological weapon employed by a sadistic foreign power to further destabilize the world and take some attention off the crashing and burning of The Big Three or the fiasco that was the Beer Summit.

4) H1N1 mutated from it's previous form, which was fairly innocuous to humans, when it was tested on swine in space on the international space station. We can all blame Miss Piggy for this. Yes, I have it on good authority it was Muppets in Space who caused this worldwide catastrophe.

5) The H1N1 vaccine is lethal and will kill you with it's mercury-infused processing. Or worse, cause brain damage and make you pee when you sneeze.

6) If you don't get the vaccine, you will surely die. If not from the swine flu, then quite possibly from the shame and embarrassment of either a) not preparing adequately for a global crisis, or b) over-preparing for a global crisis and giving in to the fear.

This has (not) been on my mind overmuch, and I have (not) been thinking about it very much. In fact, I have put so much (non) thought into this that I felt duty-bound to come out of the H1N1 closet and respond to this issue. The following excerpt is an actual comment on the subject that I left on another hard-hitting blow-the-media-lies-out-of-the-water blog:

• Not that I disagree or agree. I base most of my decisions on my in-depth research through the internet, mainly on pop culture sites, alien-conspiracy blogs, and wikipedia (THE ultimate compendium of all knowledge). And I've decided to vaccinate if there are any left if I ever get around to it. See? It's actually my laziness and reliance on the quirkiness of fate to make my decisions. It's all so much easier that way. I'm willing to take responsibility for those same decisions too, but only if they go well for me. Otherwise it's the fault of the government/media/aliens.
  
  You think I'm joking, don't you.

At this point, I'm so ready to get the stupid swine flu over with and put this issue behind me once and for all that I just might to go to the local emergency room and open-mouth kiss the first person who sneezes on me. Except for the fact that I don't open-mouth kiss strangers. Or sick people. Or people in general. Or that I live in Deliverance country.

You think I'm joking.

Things I Learned While On Vacation

My son likes some kind of Vanilla Bean Latte cookies dipped in orange juice. He devoured them on the flight. Both there and on the way back. And then asked for more.

It's still possible to go a couple of days without sleep. I'm not saying I want to do it often... or ever again. Just that I can survive. It's not pretty, though.

After 2 days without sleep and thinking I lost our passports, it's possible to become extremely paranoid and start hallucinating. (Still worried about identity theft happening again.)

A good night's sleep can fix most anything.

There is a LOT more to learn about dinosaurs than I ever imagined! (Sigh.)

Hands down, people -- especially strangers -- are much more friendly in the west. That being said, our plane from Calgary to Halifax was full of friendly, cheerful elderly people. Some that looked like they were in their 70's and 80's... ooh-ing and ahh-ing over the cuteness of the few toddlers and babies on board. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to really appreciate it as I was seriously lacking sleep. (I don't know if those friendly people were going home to Nova Scotia or just visiting. But I can tell you one very grumpy person was going "home". Me.)

You can get a sunburn in Northern Alberta in September. Ouch.

My son outgrew his footwear while we were gone. He spent a lot of the summer in sandals and sometimes barefoot. And I just wasn't paying that much attention. Suddenly, in cooler weather, I'm trying to force his foot into his size 9 and 1/2 shoes, only to find out that he's just barely a 10 and 1/2 and might soon be in 11's. How the heck did that happen? Was I really that busy? So: more shoe shopping for the boy.

Jackrabbits like living in the city. Maybe there are fewer coyotes? And they enjoy showing up in my apocalyptic dreams. Just sayin'.

Jackrabbits of the Apocalypse

I'm ba-ack! And surprisingly really glad to be back. (And glad to be back at my little spot in which I make sense of my world. But that's just stating the obvious.)

Side note: I'm having trouble writing this today, literally, because my cat, who apparently missed me while we were gone, is rubbing herself all over me and the computer, and I keep having to retype. Her typing skills are not what they should be.

I've been gone for almost 2 weeks, and my "vacation" was not really a vacation, of which some of the reasons I won't go into here. I will talk about some aspects which are on my mind and are totally making me BENT right now. Yes, vacations are relaxing. I advise you all to go on one soon. Really.

This vacation was really a trip to take my son to visit his father where he works. I wanted to be nice, and not put ALL the travel stress on him, and not make him miss so much work. But I'm not patting myself on the back here for being "nice". I just did what I thought was the right thing to do. But this isn't about that.

The trip was also a chance for me to reconnect with my family. So, in a sense, it was a family "vacation". And I stress again, please go on vacations. It's good for you.

So I saw my family again--my sister and her husband, my brother and his new girlfriend, and my mother. And as much as I love my family, I had a painful reminder of why I tend to move/live/travel so far away from them. Example:


So, I'm glad to be home. For comparison purposes:

Note: the picture is metaphorical only. So minus the palms, camels and sand dunes. Remember, it's a metaphor. (I'm still hankering for a more literal interpretation of this picture to manifest itself in my life. Seriously waiting. And I'm waiting. And waiting. But anyways.)

Every family has it's own brand of crazy. I have a different crazy in my family of origin than I see with the in-laws. Each takes it's own time and adjustment to learning to deal with and live with. Now I'm starting to think that the word "normal" doesn't have a place in the world. Or shouldn't. There is no "normal". There's just other brands of crazy, which look like "normal" from a distance. Grass is greener, etc.

My complaint: I don't feel like I'm a real part of my family. And our family is not that close. We all live far apart, don't stay in touch regularly, and on many levels don't really know each other all that well. That being said, I feel very much NOT a part of my family unit, such as it is. I think I've carried this since I was 15 when my mother sent me away to boarding school (and wouldn't let me come home when I didn't like it), and then heard from both my brother and sister that the family was better off without me. I think I've spent a lot of years trying to put that behind me, but it's hard when no-one wants to talk about stuff. It's also hard to try to be a part of things when a certain family member spent my childhood tearing me down so that she could feel more like a part of things. It's hard to WANT to make any effort towards another family member who was (and might still continue to be) very abusive and now reclusive, and has special needs. I just don't WANT to cater to those needs when it's not going to really make a difference in the larger scheme of things. (Can we say issues here?)

(Another side note: I'm frankly amazed I haven't become a druggie/stripper/prostitute/hired assassin/lawyer with all my family history and issues. I'm really having trouble figuring out what to write as I give an overview of my trip... I need to get stuff off my chest.)

So through the family tension that resulted, I was busy and constantly on the run. I met new people, played a little friendly poker, lost a lot of sleep, spent time with old friends and laughed a lot (thank you, guys), and watched my son alternately cling to me and have a blast with the friends and family. I got to relax a little, read a little, chat a lot, complain some, and even help a teen with her homework (which was like one of the highlights of my trip because a) I'm a nerd like that, and b) that kid just rocks).

We watched the kids chase and catch a LOT of grasshoppers, chase each other, have ongoing water fights, and just have a lot of fun. We did a LOT of driving and got to discover even more about dinosaurs and see fossils in person. We discovered the kiddie part of the waterpark was too dangerous for us, so we ended up mostly in the wave pool (deep end) and riding the big people waterslides. Which my boy did a lot of by himself. Because he rocks.

We saw a bear, coyote, many hawks and eagles, and tons of magpies. While in the Calgary suburbs, we saw jackrabbits. I think it's distinctly odd that I've seen more jackrabbits there than anywhere else. And I've been around. Also, while sleeping at my sister's house, I dreamt every single night of the apocalypse. I kid you not. And the jackrabbits started showing up in those same dreams too.

And then I got to crash late last night in my own bed. And sleep and sleep and sleep. I'm so-o-o-o-o glad to be home.

I'm realizing my "family" is my son. My home is wherever he is. Where he feels he has a place. Where he's comfortable. And right now, whether I like it or not (or how much I think this province sucks), it's here. And you know what? I'm okay with that.